angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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