Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
