Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
smell my finger.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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