my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize