belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
