there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
