Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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