I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Little spoons don't ask big questions
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
