I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Do you have feelings for this penis?
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
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