god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Just pee around me
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
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