you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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