i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
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