google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
You're breaking my sexual little heart
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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