We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize