its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
she looked like the before picture.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
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