im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
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i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
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We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
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