your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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