Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i just google imaged poop.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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