oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Randomize