Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i just google imaged poop.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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