VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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