hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
