Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
