The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Welp...herpes.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
