I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
It's rum buckets o'clock
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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