If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize
