Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
