Duck Duck Cougar?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Randomize
