It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
how drunk are you?
Several
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
