i think i have herpe
just one?
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
