Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?

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(413): I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person? http://tfl.nu/zgr7

Replies (90) Good night (1513) Bad night (3610)
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(404): View more from Georgia

he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.

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(404): he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love. http://tfl.nu/ta1g

Replies (56) Good night (8362) Bad night (616)
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(269): View more from Michigan

Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".

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(269): Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid". http://tfl.nu/zeei

Replies (22) Good night (6079) Bad night (819)
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(216): View more from Ohio

ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.

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(216): ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1. http://tfl.nu/a49b

Replies (59) Good night (11140) Bad night (1189)
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(905): View more from Ontario

No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf

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(905): No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf http://tfl.nu/d4pp

Replies (8) Good night (804) Bad night (3816)
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(330): View more from Ohio

I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times

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(330): I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times http://tfl.nu/jfaf

Replies (6) Good night (2614) Bad night (895)
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(410): View more from Maryland

Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.

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(410): Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style. http://tfl.nu/gn5p

Replies (9) Good night (3527) Bad night (1071)
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(503): View more from Oregon

Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.

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(503): Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting. http://tfl.nu/fbmg

Replies (6) Good night (2672) Bad night (496)
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(503): View more from Oregon

I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.

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(503): I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend. http://tfl.nu/inq1

Replies (32) Good night (875) Bad night (3081)
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(630): View more from Illinois

And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards

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(630): And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards http://tfl.nu/vn30

Replies (2) Good night (1280) Bad night (365)
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(240): View more from Maryland

Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP

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(240): Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP http://tfl.nu/rq2g

Replies (0) Good night (646) Bad night (371)
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(614): View more from Ohio

I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.

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(614): I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am. http://tfl.nu/znur

Replies (3) Good night (608) Bad night (245)
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(805): View more from California

It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs

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(805): It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs http://tfl.nu/6q0t

Replies (3) Good night (528) Bad night (198)
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(843): View more from South Carolina

...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.

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(843): ...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us. http://tfl.nu/7j26

Replies (1) Good night (518) Bad night (591)
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(206): View more from Washington

No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.

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(206): No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you. http://tfl.nu/9dg7

Replies (2) Good night (1071) Bad night (232)

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