I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
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