I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I should be sponsored by Trojan
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????