Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3pm strippers are depressing
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
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