you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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