Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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