No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize
