Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
