Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
