i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I think I am morally bankrupt
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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