i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
