apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Randomize