his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
