tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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