I'm laying in your front yard are you home
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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