I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
My feet surprised me
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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