This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
