Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
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