but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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