I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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