is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
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